Life, love and mung beans.

Know how some years your birthday rolls around and you really don't feel like celebrating much? This year I really didn't feel up to it, just wanted to ignore it and carry on. Not too sure why. Generally, I love birthdays.

Last week I turned 32. My darling boy treated me like a princess and I love him so much more for it. He took me to my favourite restaurant and we ate so much we both felt ill coming home. Over indulged is too weak a term for the amount we ate. Morrocan lamb with cous cous for me. Dessert was at a different restaurant and was a chocolate/raspberry tart. He bought me the gifts he knew I would love.

Yet I really had a crap day and it rolled into a crap week. I guess the funky mood was sort of because I work in a new unit and I don't feel "part of the crowd" - don't think I ever will. I knew that noone would remember or even realise it was my birthday. Noone did.

I think it was the a little to do with the "getting older" and still not having acheived a few important things in my life. Every birthday is just another reminder that I am indeed getting older and another year has passed with nothing exceptional happening. I hate this feeling. I hate getting older. I hate being 32 and feeling like there is still something missing.

Why can't life be as simple as 5 years ago?