Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Pre-marriage counselling

What is it about counselling or whatever that makes it feel okay to discuss things to strangers that you haven't spoken to anyone about in a long, long time? What is it that makes it okay to share your phobias, your dreams, your highs and your lows with people you have never met before?

Don't get me wrong - I am a pretty open and consider myself somewhat honest straight up person. But I have to admit I find it quite surreal when I sit back and review everything we discuss.

For those who have never had couples counselling before I would say - go for it! Don't sell yourself short and take the easy "one weekend" option for pre-marriage counselling. Do the hard yards and take the time to stop and listen to your partner. If not through an organised program then through a professional counsellor or someone.

I thought I knew most things about my relationship, my partner and myself, but as they say... You never stop learning. So far there have been a few lightbulbs going on for me. Some things that have made me stop and think about my actions and their implications on others around me. Some things have made me take stock of what is important to me. There will be some changes in the not to distant future in my life and the choices I make.

Who would have thought it... Apparently I actually do have annoying habits!

1 comment:

MJAPA said...

I'm a major advocate for having a counselor. It comes in extra handy if you have one that you have a long term relationship with when things come up, because you can get right to it instead of having to wade through all of the prelim stuff first. We have someone that has been my doc since 97 who we see if we hit road blocks. Usually in 1 or 2 visits we have it worked out. Every newleywed should have a great therapist that has worked with them before in their speed dial!